Should You Postpone Treatment for School? What I Learned

**Content warning: This is one person’s story; everyone will have unique experiences in recovery and beyond. This story mentions eating disorder thoughts, behaviors, and symptoms, as well as suicidal ideation. Please use your discretion when reading and speak with your support system as needed. If you are experiencing suicidal thoughts, help is available by texting or calling 988.

This blog was submitted anonymously by a former client of The Emily Program.

If you find yourself asking whether treatment can wait, I’ve been in your shoes. I’m 20 years old, and I’m currently in recovery. My diagnosis is OSFED (Other Specified Feeding and Eating Disorder) – Atypical Anorexia, but I believe that my experience navigating recovery while in school pertains to all kinds of eating disorder diagnoses and symptoms.

My ED began in 2019, but it really took hold in 10th grade, during the second half of 2020. At that point, I had been seeing an outpatient care team for about a year, but that level of care just wasn’t enough support for me. It had been recommended that I seek treatment at The Emily Program, and I had a consultation in early 2021. I qualified for the Intensive Day Program (IDP), but my mom told the therapist that I wouldn’t be going—she was worried about how treatment would affect my schooling.

My school was a few weeks away from returning to in-person learning after COVID, so it felt especially important to my mom that I finish out the school year. Unfortunately, my ED really had me struggling with the false narrative of not being “sick enough,” and this was another situation that my ED latched onto. I thought that if my mom didn’t believe I was sick enough to prioritize treatment, then I would have to get sicker to prove her wrong.

I was convinced that the only way my suffering could be taken seriously was if my symptoms were worse. (This is obviously a very disordered way to interpret the situation, but that’s what having an ED can be like.) My symptoms got more extreme and more frequent after this. I also began to struggle with suicidal ideation due to the impact of my ED.

In November of my 11th-grade year, I was experiencing significant health complications and was urged by my outpatient doctor to go to the ER and to call The Emily Program again. This time, The Emily Program recommended residential treatment instead of IDP. By this point, my eating disorder had progressed so much that the level of care I originally qualified for was no longer enough. 

Waiting to begin intensive treatment likely added around two months to my overall time in higher levels of care. I ended up missing the last four months of my 11th grade year, versus the two months I might have missed the year before. If you’re in a similar situation, I urge you to start treatment as soon as possible.

How Untreated Eating Disorders Can Impact School

Every kind of eating disorder can negatively impact school. No matter the diagnosis or symptoms, thoughts of prior meals, future meals, movement, and more are overbearing. It can be really challenging to focus on schoolwork or lectures when your ED floods your thoughts. When my eating disorder was at its worst, I was failing almost all of my classes, which was very unlike me. 

Due to malnutrition, I was unable to focus in class, complete (or even start) my homework, participate in my gym class (a requirement for graduation), or even play my clarinet. Because of my ED, I was very close to not graduating on time. On top of all of that, being away from my parents (my only form of accountability at the time) for seven hours a day also increased my symptom usage.

Thanks to recovery, I’m now in the best place I’ve been since developing my eating disorder. My physical health is stable, I’m approaching a full year without depressive symptoms, and I just completed my first full year of school since 10th grade. I’m no longer tied to the scale and stuck in constant body-checking. It’s incredibly freeing to focus on things beyond food, symptoms, and my body. For the first time in years, I’m experiencing the world in full color; not the muted, grayscale version that came with the ED. Choosing recovery is hard, but I don’t have any regrets.

So, What If Treatment Disrupts School?

The truth is, it likely will. It’s really scary to choose recovery knowing this, but it’s always worth it. 

I look at it this way: either way, life gets disrupted:

Option 1: You wait, because the ED feels “manageable” right now—but you still miss out on fully living. (Then inevitably, the ED becomes more severe and/or impactful, because that’s what EDs do.)

Option 2: You begin treatment as soon as possible. It might feel hard in the short term, but it shortens the recovery process, helps you avoid a greater impact, and lets you reclaim your life sooner.

Choosing treatment now can be difficult, but I guarantee it’s the right choice.

We want to hear your voice of recovery! If you are interested in participating in our Recovery Conversation series, please email blog@emilyprogram.com to learn more.

If you or a loved one is experiencing an eating disorder, help is available. Reach out to The Emily Program today by calling 1-888-364-5977 or completing our online form.