Posts Tagged “Parenting”

By Aronson

Dear me, when I was you,

Hi, you. I would ask how you’re doing, but sadly, I know how you’re doing. You’re scared. You’re worried. You’re hurting, confused, angry, frustrated, and broken. You’re thinking of every comment, every look, every everything that has ever been said to your child. You want to scream. You want to cry. You want to give up. You don’t need my permission. However, I personally did all these things – so I say with wisdom, it’s okay.

Allow me to also say for you: I’m sorry, this sucks. This REALLY sucks. This is not anything you did, you caused, or you can fix alone. I do not just say this – I lived this. Writing this letter to you brings so much emotion and so many feelings that I’ve not felt in a long time.  I was you a few years ago. If someone wrote this letter to me a few years ago, I would have thought there’s no way these feelings would ever not be the forefront of my life. If we had not found treatment for our daughter, I’m pretty sure I’d still have those feelings or worse, we may not have our daughter with us today.

If you are reading this it means you are looking for answers, for the sign you need to know that treatment is the right direction. If you are wondering if treatment is the right answer, let me tell you – it is. If you are looking into what treatment means or what it looks like it, this means your loved one would benefit from treatment.

I understand the fear, the worry, the second-guessing, and the ache that comes with even considering treatment for your child. I’ve been there. I’ve played the mind games. ‘If my kiddo eats this food, it means they don’t have a problem. If we make it through a meal and he completes most of the meal, it’s going to be okay. If I just keep buying the muffins that she will actually eat from the grocery store, then we don’t have a problem.’

The holiday season often brings a complex mix of emotions for those considering eating disorder treatment. While others focus on festivities, you may be wrestling with questions that feel too heavy to answer: “Is this the right time for treatment?” “What about our family traditions?” “How will we handle the holidays apart?”

These concerns are valid and deserve caring, thoughtful answers. Over the years, we’ve worked with thousands of individuals and families navigating treatment during the holiday season. Time and again, we’ve seen how this unique time of year can foster moments of healing and strengthen relationships.

“The holidays come with so much pressure to make them ‘perfect,’ but it’s ok if they look different,” says Taylor Rae Homesley, LPC, CPCS, CEDS-S, Executive Director of our Child, Adolescent, and Adult treatment center in Atlanta. “It’s worth giving up one ideal holiday season now to get a lifetime of meaningful celebrations in recovery.”

Below, our clinical experts address common questions about eating disorder treatment during the holidays. We’ll explore how treatment can help you rebuild family connections, discover new ways to celebrate traditions, and find deeper meaning through recovery.

Morgan Eagan (she/her) is an Admissions Coordinator for The Emily Program and a longtime advocate for destigmatizing mental health. She has a history of working with both adults and children diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder (ASD) and, in recent years, has discovered a passion for helping individuals seek eating disorder care. Morgan is committed to making the process of seeking treatment as accessible as possible. With this blog, she hopes to alleviate the confusion she often sees when individuals are first diagnosed with an eating disorder. She aspires to continue aiding The Emily Program clients in their steps to recovery and deconstructing the negative connotations associated with mental health treatment. 

When you or your child is first referred to eating disorder treatment, it can feel scary and overwhelming. On top of that, it can be confusing if the type of care recommended by your primary care provider differs from what the admissions specialist at the treatment center suggests. Treatment centers conduct more specialized assessments, which often reveal a fuller picture of an eating disorder. 

Seeking eating disorder care for your child can be an overwhelming decision. Their illness has already robbed them of so much, and you can’t help but wonder: Won’t treatment mean sacrificing even more? Maybe it can wait until a better time, you reason – when school is out, or social activities have settled down. For now, you just want your child to have some semblance of normalcy. 

It’s understandable to want to shield your child from interruptions to their life, especially when they’re already struggling. However, postponing eating disorder treatment often only leads to greater pain and disruption. In fact, every moment spent waiting for the “right time” is a moment an eating disorder can take deeper root.

Here are three reasons not to wait for the “perfect time” to get help for your child with an eating disorder.

Eating disorders are serious, potentially life-threatening illnesses, and yet, research shows that a majority of diagnosed, suffering adults will not seek treatment for their symptoms or concerns. We know that early treatment is critical when navigating the challenging landscape of an eating disorder. The longer one delays care, the greater the risks are for an extended duration of illness, heightened social isolation, increased body shape concerns, deeper internalization of eating disorder-related cognitive distortions, and worsened mental and physical outcomes, including a heightened mortality risk. 

The treatment of eating disorders often requires practitioners of all disciplines to engage in challenging conversations with their patients. Managing ambivalence, preferences, and resistance to recommendations for entering specialty eating disorder care are known concerns when working with adults affected by eating disorders. For adults with children, concerns about care often revolve around leaving behind family. 

As a parent, you want nothing but the best for your child. So when it comes to finding the right program to treat their eating disorder, it’s important to pick one fully equipped with the specialized knowledge and tools necessary to meet their unique needs.

Many eating disorder programs offered today began with treating adults and later added services for children and adolescents. However, The Emily Program’s centers in the Southeast were specifically built with children and adolescents in mind. Treatment at The Emily Program stands out in our ability to provide age-appropriate, best-practice care tailored to the unique medical, nutritional, and psychosocial needs of children and their families.

Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder (ARFID) is a newer eating disorder diagnosis that is not as well-known as conditions like anorexia and bulimia. Once classified as Selective Eating Disorder (SED), ARFID most commonly affects children and young adolescents. Parents often find it challenging to support a child with an eating disorder, especially when the disorder is not widely known or discussed.

In this blog, we will provide an overview of ARFID, its risk factors, warning signs, and helpful ways to support your child affected by this type of eating disorder.

Perhaps you’ve noticed some differences in your adult child’s behavior. These changes are mostly related to their eating and exercise habits, but extend to their general demeanor. 

Maybe they push their food around on their plate without eating much of it. 

Maybe they can’t seem to stop talking about their new diet and exercise regimen.  

Maybe they deliberately avoid family gatherings that involve food. 

Approaching your child about these behaviors may feel daunting. You might worry about upsetting them or creating distance in your relationship. While you understand that they are now in charge of their own health decisions, you are deeply concerned about their well-being. The situation is undeniably distressing. Though you cannot force your adult child into seeking help, your support, empathy, and guidance can empower them to take that crucial next step. 

Read on to learn some helpful tips on initiating a conversation about eating disorder treatment with your adult child. 

If your child is under 18, the approach is different. Read our guide on how to help a child with an eating disorder.